Wednesday, February 29, 2012
Organic farm-to-fork dinners are illegal? You betcha' ! At least so says the government (because, you see, the food was certified by Utah, but would be served in Nevada).
In fact, this state-line-crossing mad-farmer conspiracy rendered the organic food so "illegal" that government agents in Nevada forced organic farmers to destroy their organic meat and vegetables by bleaching them. That way, the food couldn't be used even to feed the farmers' livestock.
But at least the "helping" government agent is compassionate. Lovable. Even endearing. Here's a snippet from the organic/secret gov't. agent exchange:
Helpless (but cheerful) organic farmer: "And who are you?"
Government agent: "Mary Oaks from the [inaudible] Nevada Health District."
Hapless organic: "And why are you here?"
Government agent: "That's all the information you need. I do have a personal life, too."
Say, Agent Oaks, we're glad you've got one, but we were sort of hoping for a personal life, too.
Praise God they never inspected my breast milk.
Ah, but did you know the island of Nevis is selling citizenship for $250k a person. Too rich for my blood, but damn, how tempting is an uncharted desert isle!
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